Stephanie Marinelli ’25, Managing Editor
I don’t know what it is with me this week, but I just can’t seem to get anything done. Well, let me rephrase that; I am getting things done, but at a much slower rate. It’s that time of the year when every beginning is coming to an end. Finals are soon, and I’m getting a bit nervous about how much I have to do, and how little motivation I have to do it. Even writing this article was a whole ordeal. I stared at the computer screen for at least an hour, trying to convince myself that once I get this done I’ll feel better. But you know what else would make me feel better? A good old NAP- NO, I can’t. Because once I close my eyes, they aren’t opening until tomorrow morning. So, I thought, why not just complain about how I feel to whoever wants to listen? My mother says it’s what I’m best at.
Currently, I have a severe aversion to critical thinking. You want to know why? Because I’ve done it enough. I think I’ve reached my limit of asking “why,” “when” and “how” for the year. What if I’m content with not knowing what goes on for a bit? Is that so bad of me to say? I have enough confidence in my abilities right now, I think I can take a few months without practice. Of course, I don’t mean to sound egotistical, but rather, like someone who craves living in ignorance for just a bit. After all, isn’t it “bliss?”
I want to be able to take a break and not have a mental checklist in the back of my mind about everything I still need to do. And to those folks who tell me to just “not think about it,” thanks so much, I’ll keep it in mind. What I’m trying to get at here is that I need summer to come quicker. And before any of you think that I’m complaining about college overall or the many academic privileges I’ve been given, that’s not it. I am incredibly grateful and fortunate to be able to access many different types of courses, as it has made my life much more fruitful. But this last half month left is not necessarily representative of the steady intake of information that I’m used to. Honestly, it’s a race to the end. The “final boss.”
I know everything is going to be okay, and my finals WILL get done on time. I’m not entirely sure how, but they will. Sometimes, it’s better not to think about what lies ahead, as it can become overwhelming QUICKLY.
So, what I can say to myself and any of you out there who feel the same way is yeah, these next few weeks might not be the most optimal, but don’t let this adversity tear you down physically, mentally, or spiritually. We don’t always have control of external factors, but how we internalize such is entirely up to us. If you don’t get the best grade on your exam, so what? If you tried all that you could, what else is there to do? Things happen, it’s life.
Okay, I’m done with my rant. I think I’m going to go write that paper that’s due tonight….
